September 15, 2020

habit hopping

Jumping from habit to habit trying to fix yourself is what a lot of the self-help books say, so that is what you try, right?

Been there.

Habits are helpful and how we get through our day without spending all of our brain power on brushing our teeth, getting dressed and driving to work.

Here is where you go wrong, though.

When you find yourself, hopping from this meditation to that meditation to walking to closing down the kitchen at 7pm to a gratitude journal, and on and on never finding any habits that are “right” for you.

Because you are trying to find a habit to “fix” you rather than developing a habit to understand yourself in order to become Naturally Thin, be more calm or more productive.

No habit is better or worse than another.

But a habit will only serve you in creating what you want in your life if it is fueled by a compassionate curiosity.

When you develop a habit to “fix” yourself it goes like this…

I am not thin enough so I will “fix” that by developing a habit of going to the gym 5x/week to lose weight. Then I will be the person I want to be.

I am not successful enough so I will “fix” that by getting up at 5am to work more so that I can make more money. Then I will be more worthy of my husband’s appreciation and love.

I am not calm enough so I will “fix” that with meditation. Then my kids will see me as the perfect mom.

When you use the “fix” it energy, you hop from habit to habit or find yourself with 20 obligatory habits.

The fuel driving those habits is self-loathing, obligation and shame.

Not only is it exhausting, but the habits never seem to work.

Instead, create lasting changes with less effort by fueling habits with a desire to understand your mind because when your mind and your behavior are aligned, it is easy.

The effort required when you habit hop trying to “fix” something is like learning to drive for the first time versus driving home from work and not quite remembering because it just happened so effortlessly.

Click below to listen to this week’s episode to learn how to stop habit hopping and create habits that fuel the change you really want.